[OFFTHEHOOK]

Being a stepfather of 2 teenage daughters isn't easy these days financially. There father owes us a couple thousand dollars. He hasn't paid a dime of child support in over a year. He also is supposed to provide medical. This P.O.S. doesn't even call these girls. He used to have a good job providing all of the above and then everthing went downhill. I won't get into specifics. He did lose his job. He lives in PA. How does whoever handles this let people get away with this???? I'm not struggling because of this but, step up to the plate and be a man already.

 

[Dugan]

Your wife needs to file with the New York State department of child services, or go to family court and if and when he finds a job, the state will then garnisher his paycheck. Also, if he receives any tax rebates, that will also go straight to her.

She needs to file the paper work. They will also back date and he will have to make up the back child support that he owes.

 

[crabman1130]

If he lost his job maybe he is having a hard time providing for himself. Maybe he doesn't have anything to send to you. Trying to pay rent, health insurance, food, and other expenses on unemployment insurance is almost impossible unless you dip into savings.
But at least he should make contact to explain, and talk to his kids.

 

[MakoMike]

Do like Digan says and file the paperwork. You can't get blood out of stone, but at least if he starts working again you'll get paid.

 

[slaterock]

All women should be shot after your done wih them.

This post edited by slaterock 10:32 AM 05/29/2008

 

[rydogg]

 

[Scott1280]

slaterock wrote:
All women should be shot after your done wih them.

 

[AZFISHKILLER]

Be their Dad and take care of them, if he don't want them. It will make your life much more peacefull.

Also when they grow up, they will appreciate what you did for them.

All we are, is what we leave behind us in this world, and how we are remembered..

The rest will take care of itself with a little help from God.

 

[fish4me]

AZFISHKILLER wrote:
Be their Dad and take care of them, if he don't want them. It will make your life much more peacefull.

Also when they grow up, they will appreciate what you did for them.

All we are, is what we leave behind us in this world, and how we are remembered..

The rest will take care of itself with a little help from God.

It doesn't matter how much money you have or how many toys you die with, but if during your life, it can be said that you have made a difference in the life of a child then everything was worth it. My opinion.

 

[AZFISHKILLER]

fish4me wrote:
AZFISHKILLER wrote:
Be their Dad and take care of them, if he don't want them. It will make your life much more peacefull.

Also when they grow up, they will appreciate what you did for them.

All we are, is what we leave behind us in this world, and how we are remembered..

The rest will take care of itself with a little help from God.

It doesn't matter how much money you have or how many toys you die with, but if during your life, it can be said that you have made a difference in the life of a child then everything was worth it. My opinion.

EXACTLY!!!!!!

 

[OFFTHEHOOK]

We did file the paperwork and we did the court thing. I guess we just have to wait till he starts working. I do provide and take care of them the best I could. They do appreciate what I do for them. It would just be alot easier with his funds and benefets being provided. The girls have basically given up on this guy.

 

[tiderunner70]

it goes both way's. i am a single father with sole permanent custody of my children. and the so called mother of the year does not pay jack squat. she will eventually have to pay but the court will let her get away with it for awhile.

 

[Scott1280]

One other piece of advice I give to anyone in a divorce situation: YOU always do the right thing! If he's a putz, deadbeat, whatever, let him be who he is, but don't slam him to the kids. First off, you wouldn't be telling them anything they don't see for themselves. Secondly, no matter what an ass he is he's their father, and they will identify with him as they grow up. His actions and decisions are what suck, not him as a human being. Much like you should tell your kid HE's a "bad Boy", you should tell him what hid did was bad, and he should know better because he's smarter than that. It may sound like touchy-feely mumbo jumbo, but when they grow up it will make a world of difference in their self-image.

 

[crabman1130]

OFFTHEHOOK wrote:
He used to have a good job providing all of the above and then everthing went downhill. I won't get into specifics. He did lose his job.


He paid everything until he lost his job. That's not being a deadbeat, that's falling on hard times. If he were working and avoiding responsibility I would say hang him, but this looks like someone wants their pound of flesh.

 

[Learning2Tog]

slaterock wrote:
All women should be shot after your done wih them.

Ha Ha Ha!
If only it were that easy.

 

[OFFTHEHOOK]

crabman1130 wrote:
OFFTHEHOOK wrote:
He used to have a good job providing all of the above and then everthing went downhill. I won't get into specifics. He did lose his job.


He paid everything until he lost his job. That's not being a deadbeat, that's falling on hard times. If he were working and avoiding responsibility I would say hang him, but this looks like someone wants their pound of flesh.

There is more to the story then I posted. Yes he has fallen on hard times. But he hasn't helped himself either.

 

[crabman1130]

Don't give half a story. I posted what I did because you made it sound like he would do it if he could. I could also see him feeling down about his situation and that's why he hasn't contacted the girls. That's what happens when you don't give details, people fill in the blanks and next thing you know the story goes wrong.

Like someone already pointed out, you can't get blood from a stone. Taking him to court will only put him more in the hole and then you will have to wait that much more for any money. Plus lawyers will cost you too. I would put this behind me and get on with my life. Once he's out of your mind you will be able to enjoy the things you have.

 

[fish4me]

Somewhere between both stories is the truth.

Islanders still stink

 

[AZFISHKILLER]

fish4me wrote:
Somewhere between both stories is the truth.

Islanders still stink

This Thread has been Hijacked!!!!!!

 

[hairbone]

There is always more to the story and this one is one sided as we do not have all of the facts but the thing is to do right by your wifes children and not crticize the childrens father to them at least.

I have joint physical & legal of my kids and my ex fell on hard times 18 months after recieving a large divorce settlement that I watched her piss away over a six month period. The kids moved in full time for about three months and she had the balls to file a "change in circumstance" wanting additional child support even though the kids lived with me. She dropped he complaint about 2 days after our first court appearance when she realized I was filling a cross motion for support and arreas money she owed me.

The best thing to do is open the lines of communication between the adults in your situation till this guy gets back on his feet. He will owe arreas up to the date a court filling happens but he will be granted a change in circumstance and end up owing squat, or that is my interpretation of the law.

The only thing you will gain from this experience is a lawyers bill. My running total to date from the start of my divorce is over $29K. Good luck, HB